Fried Rice: Updated

Wed 30 October 2019 by psu

I wrote a page about fried rice a long time ago. Since then I've had an obvious realization that I will share with you now.

I can't for the life of me understand why fried rice has not been at the center of a larger food truck/fusion cuisine/multi-cultural/mashup food scene. There are ramen sandwich trucks, bbq trucks, fancy mac and cheese trucks, bad lobster roll trucks (they have to be bad, don't @ me), Japanese style hot dog trucks and any number of other cross-cultural experiments and street food remixes and yet the humble plate of fried rice is still relegated to its American Chinese Takeout ghetto. I do not understand why. The menu writes itself:

  • BLT Fried Rice: thick bacon bits, rice, stir fried iceberg, cherry tomatoes, crispy bread crumbs on top, kewpie mayo drizzle.

  • Hot Dog Fried Rice: a Chinese American classic. Just make fried rice with hots dogs in it.

  • Chili Dog Fried Rice: just what it says. Hot dog fried rice with chili on top. Maybe top it with fritos.

  • Currywurst Fried Rice: same idea. But with currywurst.

  • Kielbasa Fried Rice: Polish sausage and sauerkraut.

  • Spicy Chicken Fried Rice: fried rice with Nashville Hot Chicken

  • Kim Chi and pressed Tofu Fried Rice: because vegetarians should not be bored.

  • Double Egg Fried Rice: any of the above, finished by mixing egg white into the rice for that shiny richness, and then topped with a slow cooked soft egg for that extra egginess.

  • Smoked Short Rib Fried Rice, Pulled Pork Fried Rice, Burnt Ends Fried Rice.

  • "Roman" Fried Rice with potatoes, thyme, a ton of black pepper, and Romano cheese.

  • Oh. That crazy Japanese omurice, which is fried rice topped with an omelet. You can spin 50,000 more things off of this idea.

The list is infinite. I can do breakfast fried rice, lunch fried rice, fried rice for a fancy dinner, fried rice to replace poutine after a night of binge drinking.

And, if you want something wetter, I can do all that the same shit with congee.

Why hasn't this been done?

Category: Food